00;00;08;24 - 00;00;32;09
Unknown
This is the perfect thing to do. It really is. It really is. No one wants to stay home. I know exactly. Would you like to start by reading? I would, I'm going to give you just a little a brief synopsis of this story. Crash Into Me is a story of Cecilia Chen, who is a Jamaican Chinese artist who is raised in the States but has been living in Paris for 20 years with their husband and two kids.
00;00;32;09 - 00;00;52;06
Unknown
And her husband is a French filmmaker, and he books a job shooting directing a trilogy in Hollywood. And so the family picks up and moves to the West side of Los Angeles and to a very wealthy enclave after Cecilia spent 20 years in living in France. So it's sort of it's a bit of a reverse culture shock, if you will.
00;00;52;06 - 00;01;15;28
Unknown
And very early on in the story, Cecilia runs into someone from her past, literally in a car accident, and they developed this very intense and complex relationship that threatens to enter entire life. And it's another woman. So here begins crash into me. I'm going to read the first few pages and then there, and then we'll do questions. Yes.
00;01;15;29 - 00;01;25;03
Unknown
Or hold on.
00;01;25;05 - 00;01;56;16
Unknown
Chapter one intersection, Los Angeles, February 2015. It is her neck that I see first, long and poetic, a whisper of beauty unexpected. The side of the road on a mid winter's morning. A weekday at that winter is curious here. Sunny and 60s and warm rain on the rarest of occasions. And yet the people are opened. And yet the people are all bundled and down.
00;01;56;18 - 00;02;24;16
Unknown
I'm not certain I'll get used to it. This non weather, whether this identical dressing, this new life. But there she is, faintly ethnic with her graceful neck, wearing a stylish trench which is decidedly not down, making her way to the street side of her shiny black electric vehicle. Much sleeker than mine. I assume she has no kids, no wrappers jammed in the door handle, the back seat, no cleats, no balls, no point shoes in the rare.
00;02;24;18 - 00;02;46;26
Unknown
Not with that neck from across the intersection. I watch as she hitches a driver's door open. She's juggling a cup of coffee, an oversize handbag, a yoga mat. The light changes and I pull up parallel to her and catch her eye through my sunglasses, through her impossibly large ones. Is she vacating the spot? She nods, the faintest of a smile.
00;02;46;26 - 00;02;52;14
Unknown
And in that moment I think I may know her.
00;02;52;16 - 00;03;15;12
Unknown
I hear the noise before I feel the impact. A keen screeching, a determinative crunch, and then what? Sounds like my mother's voice yelling something not quite discernible in Jamaican patois. My SUV lurches once and then a second time, careening sideways into the open car door, pinning it back against the wheel, an angle that seemed impossible a second before.
00;03;15;14 - 00;03;48;00
Unknown
There is glass shattering and metal twisting and coffee on my windshield. I hear the Jamaican expletives again. Jeez. On piece. It takes a good moment before I realize the person yelling is me. At first, I don't see her. I imagine she's fallen. Trapped her neck crush between her car door and my fender. I imagine the worst. But when I glanced back through the rare vent glass, she is there, standing between her cars by her back door, mouth agape, shaking alive.
00;03;48;02 - 00;04;09;24
Unknown
She must have stepped aside the last moment. I have not killed her. I have not killed her. My sunglasses are no longer on my face and my hand back in. All its contents are on the floor. My phone, which was resting in the cup holder, is not there. And yet the announcer on NPR droned on about Aleppo as if nothing has happened here on Montana Avenue, as if I just did.
00;04;09;24 - 00;04;30;19
Unknown
Not almost into life. And then I realize the engine is still running. I turn off the car, unbuckle the seat belt, and step out into the street. There's a goal sedan wedge into the rare left side of my news second hand car. Francois and I had spent days picking it out the week following Christmas. Black Lexus hybrid 17,000 miles.
00;04;30;19 - 00;04;52;14
Unknown
Good for carting kids to and fro, roomy enough to hold my equipment. A woman is at the steering wheel of a sedan. Late 30s, I think, from the little I can see of her face a poof of thick black hair, sculpted eyebrows, dark glasses. Her hands are covering her mouth. The airbag on her passenger side has deployed. There are two harness booster seats in the back.
00;04;52;17 - 00;05;21;15
Unknown
Empty. She is lucky. Are you okay? I mouth, she nods, and then she begins to cry. I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I can't hear her. But I can feel her anguish, her guilt. It's okay, I say. It's okay. But even as I say it, I realize it might not be true. I make my way around the front of my car to see the damage I have done to the other vehicle.
00;05;21;18 - 00;05;48;27
Unknown
The door is mangled and off its hinges. My fender seems to be the object holding it in place. There is glass everywhere, tiny fragments spilling like water from her window, leaving angry shards behind in their wake. The woman I might have killed is now standing on the sidewalk just in front of the cafe, trembling. She is clutching her yoga mat and handbag, but her coffee is covering her trench, her athletic top, her white converse sneakers.
00;05;48;29 - 00;06;11;26
Unknown
Are you all right? She shakes her head. She's tall, five. Nine, maybe enviably thin. The kind of body I've always I have always coveted. No hips, no boobs. Her skin is a cool cafe latte. Up close, she looks to be my age. Barely discernible lines at the corners of her delicate mouth, a faint horizontal pair sweeping her forehead.
00;06;11;28 - 00;06;35;21
Unknown
Her dark hair is wet, a wavy bob. I could not determine if she's just come from her yoga class or is on her way. Are you hurt? I ask. No, no, I'm not hurt. I just need a moment. Are you sure? I'm fine. She says, and I detect the hint of an accent. And then, moving closer to me, she gasped.
00;06;35;24 - 00;07;00;02
Unknown
You are bleeding. I feel it, then a dull throbbing, something moist on my forehead. I'd assumed it was perspiration, but it's dripping now on my brow. My hand flies up and I relive the wetness. My face. My voice is low but not low enough. And I'm embarrassed that in the midst of the spectacle and wreckage and what could have been the loss of life, I'm having a vain moment.
00;07;00;02 - 00;07;26;16
Unknown
And Swan is witnessing it back, she says, reaching to her bag to pull out a tissue. I close my eyes as she mops my forehead. Her fingers cool against my skin. A small crowd is beginning to assemble. I can hear them mumbles storefronts opening, an irritated driver blowing his corn and irritated driver blowing his horn.
00;07;26;18 - 00;07;50;11
Unknown
Sorry, this is an SUV mashup is blocking traffic. Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god, oh my God, somebody is saying not her! A peek from beneath a napkin reveals a woman from the sedan. Big hair, olive skin, tears. She's bleeding. This is your car. Oh, God. What have I done? I'm calling 911. Her voice is deep, her accent thick.
00;07;50;14 - 00;08;19;21
Unknown
Arab, I think maybe Persian. No one in LA is actually from LA. This is what Francoise agent told us when he was sweetening the deal. When he was convincing us to uproot everyone and everything, that Los Angeles was cosmopolitan, diverse, a world class city with a robust art community in all shades of the rainbow represented. He did not mention that it was staggeringly spread out, that it was notably segregated, that if I stayed in my neighborhood, I could go entire days without seeing another person who looked like me.
00;08;19;23 - 00;08;41;17
Unknown
If I wanted to see all shades of the rainbow, I would have to get in my car, which was now mangled in the middle of the road. It's not your face. The woman, covered in coffee, says she's fishing in her bag once again. This time she withdraws one of those microfiber yoga towels and positions it the at the crown of my head, applying pressure somewhere north of my hairline.
00;08;41;19 - 00;09;04;19
Unknown
It hurts. The towel is damp. It smells like her, I imagine. Like sandalwood. An expensive leather. That's the good news. But this part of the head bleeds a lot. You might need stitches and they should check you for a concussion. I don't feel concussed. Not that I'm certain I would recognize how concussed feels, but I'm not vomiting. And the world is not spinning, and I have someplace to be.
00;09;04;24 - 00;09;28;04
Unknown
Furthermore, I find the American health care system daunting, and I'm not sure how our insurance works. The production I should call Francois. The sedan driver is on her phone reporting the accident. She is saying things like a middle aged woman is bleeding from the head, a description I find unnecessarily reductive, although in truth, I don't know how she could have possibly done better.
00;09;28;06 - 00;09;47;01
Unknown
Although in truth, I don't know how she could have done better. A petite, brown skinned mixed race woman, possibly 40s, but doing a bloody good job of holding it together at home. They would have called me Matisse, but here there were so many ways to botched race. Probably best to avoid it altogether. Also, at home they would have been kinder about the age.
00;09;47;04 - 00;10;10;15
Unknown
Lie down the Middle Eastern woman commands. It is then that I notice she's wearing flannel pajamas, those ubiquitous sheepskin boots, three carat diamond earrings, a West Side mom doing the morning drop off. And then this. They say you should lie down. I balk at the idea. I feel fine and the ground is dirty. Swanwick read something in my expression, then leans into me.
00;10;10;15 - 00;10;35;03
Unknown
I'm going to look at it, she says before moving her massive sunglasses. It is then that I see her face fully for the first time, and it registers for a moment. I cannot move. I stand there silent while she surveys a wound, a million thoughts flooding my head, images disjointed, faded, weathered like black and whites from another era.
00;10;35;06 - 00;11;02;04
Unknown
The surf, the sand, goose flesh on her taut belly, her hair tickling the side of my face, her green eyes puffy the morning after. She does not recognize me, or if she does, she's doing a very good job of not letting on. And maybe that is for the best.
00;11;02;06 - 00;11;26;10
Unknown
I think our first question is, are you recording the audiobook? I've already recorded the audiobook. Of course you are wonderful. Absolutely wonderful. Thank you so much. So this this book is absolutely luxurious. It's luscious. I don't know how many people in the room have read crash into me. No one yet. Okay, a couple, we have a couple. We will give nothing away, I promise.
00;11;26;12 - 00;12;01;01
Unknown
So Cecilia is a photographer? Yes. And I love her. By the way, I love this book. Thank you so much. Thank you. What I found to be so fun about your writing is we're. We're taking this journey with Cecilia. She's a photographer and she's an artist, and she's doing an art project about beauty. Yes. And everything you describe is so sweeping and, like, sharp, crisp lines, beautiful soft curves, like everything you describe feels luscious, like you just want to sink into it.
00;12;01;01 - 00;12;22;01
Unknown
And it's really elegant. Thank you. Was that on purpose? Is that just how you write? It's. Thank you. It's a little bit how I write. And also, I'm very conscious that I was very conscious that I was writing for a photographer. I have a few friends who are a couple of good friends who are photographers, and I, I know how they see the world.
00;12;22;05 - 00;12;50;04
Unknown
I have a friend, one in particular, who is extraordinarily and she can like, come into a room and redecorate it and like, she can decorate flowers, she can set a table. Everything she does is like with intention and beautiful, like she just has an eye for things. And so I was kind of writing it the way I know photographers think, and seeing the world the way I believe photographers see the world.
00;12;50;08 - 00;13;10;03
Unknown
So yes, that was intentional. Well, it's really well done. I think it's so beautiful. And I kept having to stop and reread a sentence like, wow, okay. And then as we get to know what her art project, you know, it's not an art project, it's her. It's an installation. Yeah, it's yeah, it's a project she's working on, but it becomes an installation.
00;13;10;05 - 00;13;48;15
Unknown
And and so it's a combination of actual photographs and like a slideshow, a slideshow in a dark, like, almost like a black box with huge screens where various images are playing, a portrait she's done of women. And over the images there is there are recordings of women talking about beauty and their ideas of it and how we think of it, how we consume it, how we feel it consumes us, what it is to get older and lose it.
00;13;48;17 - 00;14;15;02
Unknown
Do we lose it? Who determines when it's lost? And and so it was really interesting to have that as a thread going throughout the entire story. And it worked so well. You know this we've got this relationship. So the book is about it's about race. It's about beauty, it's about ageism, sexism, racism. And you bring all of these elements together so perfectly.
00;14;15;04 - 00;14;29;22
Unknown
I want to know, where did you get the the idea to write this story? Oh, goodness. So prior to writing the idea of you, I'd worked on a novel for about six years, and it was a story. It was Cecilia's story.
00;14;29;25 - 00;14;54;02
Unknown
When I originally was working on it was semi-autobiographical, and it takes place in the 90s, and she's in her 20s. She has a relationship with a younger guy, slightly younger, which is a theme in my book, so I don't know where that comes from. But not not 20 years younger since she is 25. But I was I was working on it for a long time, but I could never quite get it to where I wanted it to be.
00;14;54;04 - 00;15;12;27
Unknown
And so I put it aside and I didn't write for about two years. And then when I got the idea for the Idea of you, I, I thought it was important and it would be fun to do but and relevant and, and to what was going on in the world then. But I wanted to get it out as quickly as possible.
00;15;12;27 - 00;15;31;25
Unknown
So I was writing really, really fast because I didn't want to spend six years breaking on something that I couldn't sell or whatever. And so I worked on that. And what I'd done is, in the idea of you, the protagonist, Celine, has an art gallery, and she and her partner Lalit only represent female artists and artists of color.
00;15;32;02 - 00;15;50;16
Unknown
And so I populated her gallery with either fictional artists or friends of mine who were artists who fell under one of those categories and who allowed me to use their likeness, likenesses and their works in the book. But I had a scene that was coming up with Cecelia, sorry, with Celine and her partner, and this another fictional artist.
00;15;50;16 - 00;16;04;02
Unknown
And I was trying to I was kind of like, racking my brain, like, what do I do? I want to create someone new. Do I didn't want to give it to a real person because I like the freedom to write for them. And when it's someone real, it's a little, you know. Sure, sure. You're a little more restricted.
00;16;04;02 - 00;16;19;19
Unknown
So I figured I got I kind of got lazy and thought about it. I was like, oh, you know, I'd written that other book and Cecelia was a photographer. Why didn't I just throw her in this scene? Oh, well. And so I put her in the idea of you, and I kind of gave her a scene, and it was not that big a scene for her.
00;16;19;21 - 00;16;41;26
Unknown
It was. It was a momentous turning point for Celine. And realizing how her relationship with her boyfriend, Hayes was affecting her work or her perception of her work. But it was it was really a small throwaway role. But when I was coming back to write after The Idea of You, I had about three years of writer's block and couldn't figure out what I wanted to write.
00;16;41;26 - 00;17;02;16
Unknown
And then finally I thought, why did I go back to Cecelia and look at that story again? And then I thought, well, I put her in the idea of you in its current day. At that point, it was current day, which is 2015, 16 time. And I thought, what if I picked up from where we saw in the idea of view and just follow her story?
00;17;02;16 - 00;17;22;22
Unknown
And like now she's in her 40s and she's just moved to LA with her French husband and kids, and she was looking for an art dealer. And what if I just pick up there and see where it goes? And then in 2016, I was I just dropped my kids off at school on a perfect, I don't know, Tuesday, Monday, Monday maybe.
00;17;22;22 - 00;17;42;09
Unknown
And I was going to meet my husband, the local coffee shop, and then I was heading on to the Valley to record voiceover work for 50 Shades of Gray. 50 Shades Freed because I'm in the 50 shades. Those are the last two movies, and I was in a car accident that was very similar to the one in this book.
00;17;42;13 - 00;18;03;08
Unknown
I was not injured, no one was physically injured, but our cars were completely wrecked and I some I was pulling up to park in this parallel parking to this woman's spot who was vacating her spot. And another woman rammed me from behind in my car, went flying into the other woman's car, and she stepped out just at the last minute.
00;18;03;08 - 00;18;08;21
Unknown
And I don't know how she did, but my front.
00;18;08;24 - 00;18;30;28
Unknown
Bumper, like, took off her door and pinned it back against the Wheeler for car, and it was like glass. It was terrifying. And afterwards we were all sitting out. Three of us were sitting in front of the coffee shop, like, hugging each other and comforting each other and like, you're okay, we're all fine. Total strangers. Total strangers. And the woman who'd hit me, her husband had come to the scene and he was looking at us, and he started to laugh, and we were like, what's so funny?
00;18;30;28 - 00;18;59;19
Unknown
And he said, women are so different than men. Yes. So true. Three men in an accident, we'd be, you know, assigning blame. We'd be yelling at each other to curse me. You guys are like hugging. You're like best friends suddenly. And I thought, no, he's right. But like, this is a great scene for a book like this is an interesting, like the way that these lives can come together completely randomly and and violently, and we don't know what's going to come from the relations that are going to come out of this.
00;18;59;19 - 00;19;22;10
Unknown
And I think, I think I want to put this in a book. And so I went home that day and just kind of wrote just like a quick note, like my car accident. Montana and I labeled it the file intersection. I thought, oh, it took place in an intersection and it was an intersection of lives. And it wasn't until 2019 when I got the idea to use Cecelia in the current day, that I thought, oh, I know what I'll do.
00;19;22;11 - 00;19;43;19
Unknown
I'll put her in the car accident. Brilliant. So there. That's awesome. Thank you. There's a point in the book where Cecelia is looking at her own journals, and she's wanted to write. Yes. And she lists titles of books. Yes. And one of them happens to be crashing to me. And I was like, oh, no, that was like titles of of songs.
00;19;43;21 - 00;20;14;08
Unknown
Oh, well, I think it's yeah. That point she's looking at photographs, images that she and her husband have taken and that they've kind of like labeled, you know, notes on the back. And one of them was called crash Into me, which is how so what I've done. And for those of you who read this book 17 times, you'll probably catch it, but you might not if you only read it once, is that every chapter title is a title, is a name of a piece of work that either she or a husband or Francois has made.
00;20;14;09 - 00;20;40;13
Unknown
Right? And so that's where I got very clever. Thank you very much. I love little Easter eggs. Right? I saw a meme while I was writing it. So something like, here's how the writing is going. Like I've got 40 great catchy chapter titles. I've got a beginning and end and 40 great chapter names, but no middle. And I was like, I feel very seen right now.
00;20;40;15 - 00;21;07;12
Unknown
But you stuck with it. Did it work? I did, thank you. So this this idea that Anouk, this character who becomes one of her subjects and was from her past, which is so brilliant and woven and so well, she's absolutely stunning. She's swan neck. Yes. If you hadn't already. Guess she's this one and she's talking about that kind of beauty is really a commodity.
00;21;07;18 - 00;21;40;01
Unknown
And so your book is really tackling these issues about how we seek and we desire this beauty and we consume it. So we we consume ourselves trying to attain beauty. Right. And then others want to consume the beautiful. Yes. And it's also fleeting and so ugly. Yeah, absolutely. All of that. I spent five years thinking about that and reading about that and living that to a degree and watching my friends go through it.
00;21;40;03 - 00;22;06;23
Unknown
You know, I'm Gen X and we're all kind of perimenopausal now. Sorry. And and watching our thoughts about who we are. Shift. Yeah. You know, as, as we like physically change slightly and it becomes how the world views us and therefore how we start to view ourselves through the eyes of those looking at us and consuming us in that way.
00;22;06;24 - 00;22;32;15
Unknown
And I thought it was really interesting and fascinating, particularly the women who were once really held up as beautiful. And what happens as that shifts? Who do you become like? Have you? Is that is that still a part of who you are? Will it always be a part of who you are? And if not, where do you find your value exactly?
00;22;32;15 - 00;22;53;24
Unknown
Your worth. Like when you're so used to walking into a room your whole life and everyone turns and comments about how beautiful you are? Absolutely. And then suddenly that starts to happen quite as often. Until the point where it's not happening and then what is left of you? Exactly. I know it's deep.
00;22;53;26 - 00;23;08;05
Unknown
But you also there are people who say, you know, that never, never happened to me anyway, so I'm not missing anything. But it's still like I do know that, you know, you get that thing when you're walking down the street and you catch your reflection, you're like, oh my God, it's my mom. Who is it? Like, yeah, yeah.
00;23;08;07 - 00;23;22;28
Unknown
Like I see the bags under my eyes, like in profile and like, and it's not even I was like, oh my God. When did that happen? But it's like it's the only other option is to die, right? So. Well, and that's exactly what she says in the book. Yes. The other option is to die. And I loved that.
00;23;22;28 - 00;23;46;27
Unknown
There was a point where. So we're going back to 1990 19. The books takes place in 2015, in 1996. And Cecilia is an assistant at this point. Right. So in 1996, there is a week in January of 1996 where she is assistant, an assistant to a well-renowned fashion photographer, and they're doing a big photo shoot in Couples and Lucas, which is where she first meets Anouk.
00;23;46;28 - 00;24;12;04
Unknown
So the story takes place between these two different timelines the week in 1996 and then in Los Angeles between 2015 and 2017. Why did you decide to make the present day first person? Cecilia is telling her story, but when we go into the past, its third person. So yes, a couple of things. I wanted to separate it for the reader.
00;24;12;04 - 00;24;38;26
Unknown
So I mean, it's subtle. Not everyone notices that right away, but I wanted it to be easy for the reader to know that they're in a different place. But also this story starts with an accident and Cecilia having a concussion. And so her memory is not entirely to be relied upon in in the present day. And so I wanted the flashbacks to be kind of like the definitive what happened?
00;24;38;27 - 00;24;54;06
Unknown
This actually happened. We're telling you because we know. Yeah we know. So there's a model from there. And then this model appears later, right. And Cecilia is like, you look amazing. And she's like, I want to make sure that there's no editing. I want my wrinkles to. Oh right right right. Yes. Yeah. And I thought that was an actress.
00;24;54;06 - 00;25;24;01
Unknown
And she's beautiful is very concerned. Yeah. Because I mean so I spent I've been an actor for 30 years and spent about 20 years living in LA and, and working in film and television. And, you know, you do it for so long. You you make friends and you see how other actors and actresses deal with their image and their brand and like, accepting it, what it means to change what it is.
00;25;24;02 - 00;25;49;12
Unknown
It's one thing to get older, like just all of us here in this room. It's another thing to get older with the world watching totally and also feeling like a commodity. Like I had an experience at a Delta airline lounge. I think it was like 2017. I think I was shooting in Atlanta and I was in their Delta, and a woman came up to me who worked in the lounge and she said, oh, you're aging so gracefully.
00;25;49;18 - 00;26;10;05
Unknown
And I thought, thanks, I don't like. But it was such a weird thing. I put that line in the book. It's such a weird thing to say that people feel like they that you're a public figure and they can comment on you. Right. It's one thing to comment on your work, but they can also comment on your physical physicality.
00;26;10;08 - 00;26;25;26
Unknown
And and they've been watching your physicality for 25 years. And so they've seen they knew what I look like in my early 20s. And they knew what I looked like then. And it was kind of like, oh, you know, you're holding it together a little bit like that. And then it's like, how much do you let yourself go?
00;26;25;26 - 00;26;45;10
Unknown
Or what is letting yourself go? Like, you want to stay healthy, you want to look healthy. But I also don't want to go too far over that. I don't look like myself or like the women in my family. Like, you know, my mom and my aunts and my cousins, like they're holding themselves together and and it's naturally at this point.
00;26;45;11 - 00;27;09;04
Unknown
Right? Right. But it's. Yeah. I'd read an article with Amanda Peet a few months ago, I think it was in The New Yorker, and she was writing about losing her mom and her dad almost at the same time. And, and in between, you know, dealing with two different cancers, with two different parents on separate coasts. She was also dealing with her image and whether or not she should get a facelift.
00;27;09;04 - 00;27;27;10
Unknown
Like she was thinking, do I want to do this? Is it time? Right? And I was like, you know, the things that go through your head, like I've always said to myself, oh, I will never, I will never get any work done. That would never happen. I'm going to age gracefully. I said that in college, too. And then I'm like, oh, actually you no.
00;27;27;12 - 00;27;47;22
Unknown
And tell her you're like, you're in that moment, right? And I don't judge. I think beauty is a very relative thing. It is. And if it makes you feel, if it makes you feel beautiful, absolutely. Then more power to you. And I don't absolutely don't judge. I want to talk about Cecilia. And you mentioned earlier that there was a little bit of autobiographical and much of Cecilia.
00;27;47;22 - 00;28;11;09
Unknown
It feels like she's based on you. She is part Chinese. She's from Jamaica. Tell us how much of this is based on the story itself? Is not the story itself is not me. I did want to have a Jamaican Chinese protagonist because I grew up. We have we have a decent sized Chinese population in Jamaica.
00;28;11;12 - 00;28;33;01
Unknown
But I grew up not seeing that in literature, at least American literature. And I grew up. I was born and raised in the States. I grew up in New York. And not seeing that like and, you know, it's a kind of thing like how representation matters. Like, you know, I had like, my favorite authors like Judy Blume and when I was younger or whatever, or even BC Andrew or things like that.
00;28;33;01 - 00;28;53;21
Unknown
And, and I love those stories. And you kind of put yourself in the characters shoes as much as you can, but they're still like, doesn't look like you. They still don't look like you. And so I still to this day, I don't love seeing faces on covers because I want to be able to kind of lose myself in it as much as I can and have that, like, I don't know, with cognitive dissonance, like, yeah, that's me.
00;28;53;22 - 00;29;21;18
Unknown
And then but so I wanted to see that. And because I don't even the stories I'd read by either African American authors or other African authors in the diaspora or or in England, UK or whatever, or even Jamaican British, I wasn't seeing this very specific type of Jamaican Chinese mix and like middle class, upper middle class, like I wasn't seeing that and I thought it was I just wanted to have that story out there.
00;29;21;20 - 00;29;45;25
Unknown
Well, and I felt like, you know, Cecilia is dealing with being the only one in the room over and over and over again. And here she's coming to Los Angeles and it's this melting pot, but it really isn't. It's so it's not a melting pot at all. No. And I was coming from when I, when I moved to LA, I was moving from the Upper West Side of Manhattan, which is much more integrated and diverse, and we moved from there to Brentwood.
00;29;45;25 - 00;30;05;21
Unknown
And it was like, I mean, I'd go entire days and not see someone else, Felix, like me. And and it was jarring. And I'm used to being the only one that looks like me very often in situations in my life. Like from college on, like I grew up in a very I was lucky, I grew up in a very integrated community in Westchester.
00;30;05;22 - 00;30;28;25
Unknown
Our school district started bussing in 1962, and so by the time I got there, it was really, really well integrated. And so I've always had friends of all different groups. But then, you know, I got to college and and not everyone had had that. Most people had not had that experience. And they were kind of shocked that I had that I was that I was so comfortable in all these different circles and that I, you know, I black friends, white friends, Jewish friends, Asian friends.
00;30;28;27 - 00;30;53;24
Unknown
And I could and it was like seamless moving throughout. But I like moving throughout when it also feels like it's it's. Yeah. And it feels diverse. I don't feel like I'm only the only one here now, you know what I mean? Like, yeah. And so I kind of wanted to also capture that feeling. And I thought if, if I was like, I know how we lived in LA and I know the environment that we lived in.
00;30;53;24 - 00;31;10;26
Unknown
But I thought, what if I was moving from France and I and, you know, I was just kind of thrown into this, what would after 20 years of living in Europe in a very cosmopolitan city, because Paris is very it's fairly well integrated depending on where you are. But most areas you will see all different types of people.
00;31;10;26 - 00;31;35;23
Unknown
And also because we have public transportation that is frequently used in France, unlike in LA. And so every time you get on the metro, you see the entire rainbow. Or in New York, you know, like any city that has a big city with a good subway system. But that's exactly what it is. In LA, you're in your car and you're very it can be very isolating and you don't really brush up against other people.
00;31;35;25 - 00;31;56;00
Unknown
I appreciated so much that you went into that and shared that experience with the readers. I think it's so important. Thank you. And at the same time, like we're talking about beauty, right? So and the way that you describe the reverse culture shock, like going from Paris to Los Angeles and how in Paris, like everything is done with intention, right?
00;31;56;02 - 00;32;25;00
Unknown
Like beauty and art. Like it's not just function. No, no, everything is. I mean, even the way they, like, display eggs on the shelves, like they're in cartons that are colored and, like, just beautifully arranged, like everything. Paris. Tokyo is like that. Japan is like that as well. It's like there's just so much attention to detail and presentation and the art of even the even the art of the imperfect.
00;32;25;02 - 00;32;44;12
Unknown
There's something to be said about that. And it's it's not just nothing's like haphazardly done. It's like it's it's really. And once you're once you notice that and you're paying attention, right. You'll see it everywhere in those places. And then and then you also see the lack of it in other places. Right, right, right. I want to talk about a nuke.
00;32;44;14 - 00;33;02;24
Unknown
Okay. She's so fantastic, I love her. I love her so much. I mean, I wanted to say, who's your favorite character? But, like, for me, oh, I don't, I don't know. I mean, can you have a favorite. No. I mean, even if the idea of you I didn't really. Well, maybe I did a little.
00;33;02;26 - 00;33;26;04
Unknown
Taste, but with this one. No, I don't know if I had a favorite, like. Well, I love them equally, but a nuke is especially delicious. Yeah. She's she's delicious. She's a little she's like, oh goodness, I don't know what she is. She's she's like my fantasy of what the French woman was before I moved to France. And so I was like, how are they so sexy and, and together and how are they so confident?
00;33;26;04 - 00;33;51;20
Unknown
And, and I've kind of figured out a little bit that so some of the mystery is gone. But it's also I mean I mean they're still they've still got that allure. But I just get it. It's just their upbringing. They're just they're, they're, they're the French are they're not a pure tactical country like we are for one. And so they're very comfortable with themselves, their bodies, their faces that like nudity, their nudity, being in their skin.
00;33;51;21 - 00;34;17;03
Unknown
You know what I mean? Like a nudity is you see it in, you know, magazines, in billboards, whatever. It's not it's not shamed upon your seat at the beach. You're like, it's not like it is here where we're kind of like, oh, cover everything up they feel about. I mean, I should say that they feel good over. We, they look at our, our violence in our film and television, like, what are you guys doing?
00;34;17;03 - 00;34;43;01
Unknown
The way we look at their nudity like, oh my gosh, you're having sex. And they're like, this is natural. What are you doing with your guns? Exactly. But I've discovered now living in France, like, it just it's totally innate. Like, you go to the doctor here. I've been telling the story. You go to the doctor. If you have a doctor's appointment here, let's say you're going to the OBGYN, and it's like you sit there at the doctor first and you do your intake and she, he or she will ask you questions about yourself, whatever, blah, blah, blah.
00;34;43;01 - 00;35;02;18
Unknown
And then they're like, okay, I'm going to leave the room. There's a, you know, you'll put on the robe, just take everything off, whatever. And, and I'll knock and you let me know when it's okay to come back in here. The bed is right there, the desk is here. And they're like, okay, you can just go on the on the table and just take off, you know, whatever your bra.
00;35;02;21 - 00;35;17;29
Unknown
And you're kind of like, really? You're not going to step out and they're looking at you like, why am I going to step out? I'm going to step right back in and see everything to see everything anyway. Yeah. So you're like, okay, like maybe they'll turn their head, but it's not like, you know, it's not like in America.
00;35;17;29 - 00;35;34;15
Unknown
But we're so like, okay. Like, I mean, my doctor here, who I absolutely adore, she like, it's not even a robe anymore. It's like there's two pieces of paper. Like one piece goes over your booth and the other piece, it's like you just kind of wrap it like a skirt and it's too small. And you're sitting there talking to her like, and I love.
00;35;34;15 - 00;35;55;04
Unknown
She's like, so Robin, tell me about the kids. And I'm like, well, this isn't like in France. It's like, we're not. It's just it's just not done. It's so interesting. It's so interesting. I don't know, I got off on a tangent, so anew. So I wanted a confident, self-possessed woman. And I also had this when I was on in the.
00;35;55;06 - 00;36;21;00
Unknown
So I read a lot of books on models and modeling etc. but I also knew a lot about it. I had a cousin who was a very big model in the late 80s and early 90s, and I kind of gained entry to that world through her, and I had an internship working at L magazine while I was in college and in New York, and then also my junior year I spent abroad in Paris, and I worked for their French office, and I went to all the shows.
00;36;21;00 - 00;36;46;07
Unknown
And it was during the heyday of, like, Linda and Christy and Naomi and Cindy, and so I knew that world. But when I was researching, I came across this image of a image, a video clip on Instagram of Kate Moss taken in, like in the Hamptons in the 90s, early 90s. So she's quite young. She might be 20, 19 years old, and she's kind of like just playing with whoever's shooting it.
00;36;46;07 - 00;37;07;15
Unknown
I thought it was like a hair and makeup stylist who posted it, and she's so self-possessed and coy and sexy and silly and young girl and woman and everything all worked out like in a 15 second clip, which just goes from. And she's almost like, she's almost like feral. Like there's something wild about her, but also soft and like.
00;37;07;16 - 00;37;28;06
Unknown
And I thought, whatever it is that she has, I want to capture that and give it to a nuke. Oh. You did. Oh. Thank you. All of that. All of that? Yeah, 100%. You describe her at one point as a sultry nose assist. Yeah. And I was like, oh, that's a really good phrase. Yeah. We don't love Narcisse.
00;37;28;10 - 00;37;48;12
Unknown
There's someone in the room here. Wrote a book about narcissists, actually, so. Oh, really? She was a little bit about it. Nonfiction or fiction? Nonfiction, actually. Yeah. Okay. You should have brought it. You could hold everything you want to know about narcissism just too much. Yeah, there's there's so much of it everywhere. But to describe it as sultry, because we really do love narcissists, don't we?
00;37;48;13 - 00;38;09;00
Unknown
Yeah, because they're sexy and they're there's something. Yeah, we're we're a little drawn to them, for better or for worse. And in this case, it's a little better, a little worse. You'll have to say you'll have to find out where you love to see. Yeah. There's a lot of a lot of better. Yes, yes. For sure. So the relationship between these women is so seductive.
00;38;09;00 - 00;38;29;17
Unknown
And again, I just if I were to describe this book with one word, I think it would be luscious. Yeah, I like that. Right? It's like it's delicious. Like you just thank you are excited to get into the next chapter. And I love how we're weaving back and forth. So the past plays a huge role on the present, right?
00;38;29;19 - 00;38;45;08
Unknown
Did you write it in the order that we read? So I, I, I had an idea of what was going to happen in the past, but then I kept changing things and I would change things in the present. That made me go back and change in the past, because I was trying to match up who these people were.
00;38;45;08 - 00;39;01;09
Unknown
So I'm trying to write for the current day, which would be like a 38 year old and a 45 year old woman. And then I'm also writing for a 19 year old and a 26 year old girl, and they have to be believable as the same people and growing. Yeah, it's such a good job. I was like, oh my God, she feels young.
00;39;01;11 - 00;39;24;04
Unknown
I was like, yes, good job. Thank you. But then in the end, I ended up I couldn't keep going back and forth and like, okay, I'm just going to knock out the all the 1996 stuff in one sitting, like not one sitting, but over it was over fluidly. Yeah. Over like three weeks of summer of 2023. I was in up in New England and I was just like, I'm just writing this, I'm just writing this.
00;39;24;04 - 00;39;42;24
Unknown
And that way I know the trajectory of these stories is these characters, whatever. And then I can go back and finish the other stuff later because I was going back and forth. And that's it's tricky making you mad. Yeah, yeah. And I also I write and I don't know if there are the writers here, but I, I write in Microsoft Word because I'm very old and stuck in my ways.
00;39;42;24 - 00;40;06;03
Unknown
I don't use Scrivener, which a lot of writers use. And they with Scrivener, it's just incredible. I know it's incredible because I've done the tutorial at least three times, and I still and I still don't do it, but it's like, it's this like, what do you call it, app software or whatever. And so you can like, you can have post-its and write your outline and then go into the post and write the chapter.
00;40;06;03 - 00;40;25;05
Unknown
And then you can switch around the post-its. And so you're switching the places of this chapter. You know what I mean. Like it's a really cool program. Yes. But I do Microsoft Word. So it's like page one. Like it may as well be like my typewriter whiteout. But you know, when you have a rhythm and how you write.
00;40;25;06 - 00;40;42;10
Unknown
That's how you write. You can't change that. Yeah. Well that's you know, can you tell us a little bit about your writing style and your writing habits? I'm when I'm, I'm like the girl with a little curl in the middle of it. When I'm good, I'm very, very good. When I bad, I'm hard. When I'm really in the flow.
00;40;42;16 - 00;40;59;24
Unknown
Like with the idea of you, I was obsessive. I wrote around the clock. Every little break I got, I took my laptop with me everywhere. I would write in doctor's office, like waiting rooms. I would write on the sidelines while my son was at water polo practice, or my daughter was doing gymnastics like I was writing all the time.
00;40;59;24 - 00;41;18;23
Unknown
With this. It was spread out over more time. I didn't write as intensely like that, but in the end, I kind of put a timer on myself. I was like, okay, you've got to have this done by a certain period, or it's just never going to be. It can just you can just keep going. And and writers will just tinker, Tinker, tinker.
00;41;18;24 - 00;41;41;01
Unknown
Totally. So I gave myself a deadline and then said, just do it. And then I was really good. I, I, I don't know if you've read or you're familiar with Stephen King's On writing on writing. Excellent. And he talks about, you know, the first draft you do with the doors close, meaning you are in your office door is closed.
00;41;41;01 - 00;42;05;05
Unknown
He says phones unplugged because he wrote this before, before cell phones. You don't ask and you don't ask for anyone's feedback while you're doing it. It's just like you're just in the zone and you give yourself 3 to 4 hours a day and you say, this is how many words I'm going to get, and you go to the same spot every day at the same time, and eventually your brain will know now is the time I'm supposed to show up.
00;42;05;11 - 00;42;26;04
Unknown
So even if it's the first few times, it doesn't eventually be like, oh, it's 9 a.m. and you're sitting in this desk and you're drinking this tea. I'm supposed to be writing now, aren't I? Like, I'm just be creating and it'll figure it out. So I did that for a while, and it really works. Yeah. Yes. But generally I like to write in cafes.
00;42;26;06 - 00;42;47;11
Unknown
I'm. I typically do not get the wifi when I'm in a cafe, so I'm just writing. No, I'm not looking at like, you know, Instagram or Facebook. I'm just in the zone. If I have to research something, I can look at my phone if I need to, but I'm not going to just like go down a like a rabbit hole of tweets or threads or whatever.
00;42;47;13 - 00;42;52;06
Unknown
And then I don't say.
00;42;52;08 - 00;43;14;00
Unknown
I can't remember. I was going to say something about, you're in a coffee shop, I'm in a coffee shop. Tea or coffee? It depends. I go back and forth. I don't get distracted as easily in France because they're speaking French in the background, and I can turn out that becomes white noise. I can turn it out, turn it off, tune it out, or turn it off.
00;43;14;02 - 00;43;34;08
Unknown
In LA, it was much harder because especially on the west side of LA, it's a small community and around people that if I don't know them, they're talking about other people I know or they're talking about the business. And so all of that is it feels very personal. And I want to know what's going on. Like, what project is he doing?
00;43;34;10 - 00;43;51;03
Unknown
Should I tell my person, like, audition, whatever. Oh, I know what I was going to say. When I'm in a cafe, I can't take a nap. That's another thing. So. So I like to go to cafes because I. I don't think I've ever put my computer down, like, let me just take a nap and get up later. But I will definitely do that at home.
00;43;51;03 - 00;44;09;26
Unknown
I'm sure I've seen people napping at Starbucks. Do you always like to sit at the same table or does it? Can it be any cafe? It it doesn't have to be the same table. But it's not just any cafe like in where I live in now in Paris or a couple of cafes that I go to all the time that I really love because I need I can't write outside.
00;44;09;26 - 00;44;28;14
Unknown
I get the weather is too distracting for me. Like a breeze comes by to hot, it's too cold. There's a bug that like or people walking by in conversations. And so I have to be inside and I have to. It has to be pretty on the inside. The guests have nice lighting and goodness. I mean, you're writing about esthetics, so you might as well be surrounded by this.
00;44;28;18 - 00;44;48;01
Unknown
So I've got I've got a few of my favorite cafes and nice in Paris. Yeah. How long did it take to write? This one was about five years of writing and a most and a year and a half of editing. Wow. Wow. That's awesome. Well, thank you so much for having us conversation with you. I'm honored to be here.
00;44;48;05 - 00;45;11;10
Unknown
This is you. Thanks for having me. A wonderful book. Can we do questions from the audience? Let's do it. Questions? Anyone? Anyone? Have you learned? You must have. No one has a question. Oh, I was like, come on. I. I hear you talking about Paris. I'm going to Paris and Normandy in the chateau country in about three weeks.
00;45;11;11 - 00;45;32;07
Unknown
Oh, wonderful. And a lot of people are moving overseas from the United States because it's too expensive to retire. You're not just in California, but. And then United States in general. Is is that what made you go to Paris or you were just ready to get out of LA? It was a bunch of different things. I've always been a Francophile.
00;45;32;07 - 00;45;54;04
Unknown
I've been obsessed with everything French since I was quite young. My my my aunt, my my mom's brother's wife was French-Canadian. And so we spent a lot of time in Montreal visiting them when I was younger. And my cousin spoke French, and I thought it was like this magical, like secret language they had. And I wanted in, like I wanted to know what that was.
00;45;54;05 - 00;46;14;29
Unknown
And so I started studying it when I was 12, in school, and maybe studied for eight years before I got to Paris. And my junior year abroad was the most magical year. And I told myself one day I'd moved back. And so it was just timing, like it was never perfect timing. And then during Covid, a bunch of things happened.
00;46;14;29 - 00;46;45;07
Unknown
But the first thing that happens at all my auditions went online and I figured, oh, if I can book movies or TV shows from my living room, I don't have to be here. My living room can be anywhere. Yeah. And then there's still a lot of things happening politically. And I was ready. We were ready to go. And also the kind of visa that we got, we are would I could get in with this specific visa and I could get my husband and my kids in assuming the oldest kid had not turned 18 yet and our son was like 15.
00;46;45;08 - 00;47;11;10
Unknown
So we were like, okay, let's now's the time. Let's just do it because it's never going to be perfect. And also with Covid, it was that realization that tomorrow is not promised, like people were dying. And I thought, I don't want to die in LA, not not having I don't want to die in L.A. but I don't want to die, not ever having lived out that fantasy that I'm going to go and live in Paris and write books and cafes and be James Baldwin or and or Ernest Hemingway.
00;47;11;10 - 00;47;24;29
Unknown
And so I did it because that was my that was the other thing. James Baldwin died in the south of France. Yes, he did. And B Dubois died in Ghana. Oh, I didn't believe.
00;47;25;01 - 00;47;50;17
Unknown
You had a question. Claire. Hi. She's come to visit me in Paris. Yeah, I have a September. Don't worry. You? Yes, you have yet. But when you're talking about the aging in the models and stuff. Do you follow Paulina's? I do, she's wonderful. Like, her hashtag is so amazing. Like, what is it between J.Lo and Betty White? Yeah, she's talking about it so much, and people are like, well, you're just beautiful and you're not great.
00;47;50;19 - 00;48;07;17
Unknown
But what you touched on of, like. But it's harder because everybody's watching, right? Everyone's watching you. And that's that's all they associate you with. Yeah. And so her stuff is she's so insightful for that. So I thought that you think of that in there that. Yeah. And she's having this. She just got married. She just got married last week.
00;48;07;17 - 00;48;26;26
Unknown
And like, she's having this, like, like rebirth, like finding herself and growing out her gray hair. And there's just, like, acceptance. Amazing, right. But like. Yeah, but it's also but she's also she's very open about this is what I look at without makeup and bad lighting and with posture. And this is when I pose and check the light like, and it looks like a completely different person and it's like she's.
00;48;26;27 - 00;48;53;06
Unknown
But she's like trying to teach self-acceptance. I think it's great. Just so it seems so important with this. So. Yeah. Yeah, dude. Any other? Yes. Hi. It's my cousin. Oh, wait. Is Candy Jane was that first book? I know you had a significant book hangover. Yes. With regard to the character. Yes. Are you experiencing that with this book or.
00;48;53;08 - 00;49;20;01
Unknown
No. I think with the idea of you. It was so intense. I lived with those characters in my head for a good 18 months, and I felt like I was living, breathing them. I was thinking for them, I was talking to them. They were talking to me constantly. And then when it ended, I was devastated because partially because I knew I was no longer going to be engaging with them, and partially because of how the story ends.
00;49;20;01 - 00;49;27;11
Unknown
I was feeling distraught about some of that without giving too much away.
00;49;27;14 - 00;49;47;16
Unknown
And I just loved it. I love them, I love that story, I love their world so much, and I put so much of myself into that story that it was really hard to let it go and be like and separate from them, like lose them and let them go off into the ether with this book. It was it took much longer to write.
00;49;47;16 - 00;50;04;02
Unknown
And so I was going in, you know, it was they were not consuming me the entire time. I also had like a international move during that period, like I had lot going on in my life while I was writing this. So I had space for lots of different things, and I could bring them in when I needed to bring them in and have them talk to me when I needed to.
00;50;04;02 - 00;50;38;13
Unknown
And then I could also put them aside. I also feel like with the idea of you. So they made a film of of the story that they didn't adaptation. And there was a lot of departure from the actual storyline, and that was difficult for me. And so I made a promise to myself that I would not become so closely attached to my characters that if someone were to adapt them and take them into a different, different direction, I could make have my peace with that, you know what I mean?
00;50;38;13 - 00;50;53;10
Unknown
So I feel like I specifically kind of kept them at arm's length. I was like, interesting, I love you guys. I'm going to cry over you a little bit, but I'm not going to I'm not going to cry every night for two years, which is I may have done.
00;50;53;12 - 00;51;17;12
Unknown
Wow. Yes, yes, I could have had a two part question and you kind of touched on it just now, mentioning the end of the idea of you and the movie adaptation. What was your thought about the sort of post-credit scene at the end of the movie, and then can we expect the same type of oh my gosh, ending from the end of idea of you in crashing?
00;51;17;15 - 00;51;47;18
Unknown
Or is it more I don't want to say like it's it's such a different story. It's, it's it's a different story. I can't give anything away. Yeah, it's going to a tough one, but but I feel like I do. I do feel like. Yeah. No, but I do feel like with the, with the film, I mean, I knew that I kind of knew it was going to happen cause I read an earlier version of the script and I knew they were going to sell out and do the rom com thing, because they were going to do the happily ever after.
00;51;47;19 - 00;52;15;18
Unknown
They feel like they feel like that's what American women want. That's that's what we've been fed. That's what we've been told. That's what we've been told we want. We've been programed to think that, like, if it doesn't have that, then it's not going to be acceptable. Whereas I think you can have a really incredible love story that doesn't necessarily end happy, but that you can grow from and that you would not trade for anything else in the world.
00;52;15;20 - 00;52;35;13
Unknown
I loved it. I love it. Thank you. Yes. And you've had first on the book. Thank you for reading. Thank you so much. A couple of weeks. Oh, enjoy my family. So they might not be as people as I am.
00;52;35;16 - 00;52;53;04
Unknown
But you've had all these careers before you wrote a book. And what was the idea for us? You know, you want to be an author. What was it like to be a first time? And when you wrote in the first book into them in a strong sense of you're going to write a second one and this is it for you?
00;52;53;07 - 00;53;14;29
Unknown
So I've always written for myself for pleasure. I started writing short stories, and third grade, I kept a journal very religiously between the ages of eight and 28. Like almost not missing a day, I just wrote and wrote and wrote. I wrote my first book when I was 14 years old, and it was 884 pages, handwritten pages.
00;53;15;01 - 00;53;32;06
Unknown
And then when I was 16, I started my second book, and I worked on that for about four years, and that was 1200 pages. And I put that down at some point. These were all at home in Paris in a in a box in the closet at my office. And then I started another book when I was in law school.
00;53;32;06 - 00;54;02;05
Unknown
And then I worked on this book with Cecelia and Laurie and for several years. And and so by the time I wrote The Idea of You, it was like my six book, right? One. Two. Three. Four. Fifth book maybe. Yeah. So it's so interesting. People like, oh my God, I can't listen to your debut, but I've written a lot, and I think most writers, the first book you see is not necessarily the first book they've written.
00;54;02;06 - 00;54;27;13
Unknown
Absolutely. Or if it is, it has been workshopped and reworked and reworked and reworked. It looks nothing like it did when they first started it. There's a lot of writers in this room, so, yeah. Do you have some advice for aspiring writers and, you know, inspiration? I feel like just keep writing. I know that seems like writing is like 90% rewriting, as they will tell you, write what you love because it's going.
00;54;27;14 - 00;54;44;11
Unknown
I think the the more passionate you are about your subject matter, the more enjoyable the process will be, and the more enjoyable that is, the more you will look forward to sitting down at your computer every day and churning something out.
00;54;44;13 - 00;55;05;23
Unknown
Gilda Radner said, I have these two quotes over my desk. The wall of my my office right now is like nothing on it but these two quotes. One of them is a Gilda Radner quote that says, you cannot create and judge in the same moment, so do not. I was doing that a lot after my bout with writer's block, after writing the idea of, you know, like everything I wrote, I was judging.
00;55;05;23 - 00;55;21;12
Unknown
I was like, this bad? This sucks. It sucks. Like, cross it out. Forget it. Start over. You can't do that. You just have to write and just get it out on the page. And then you can edit later. But if you're if you are critiquing yourself as it's coming out of you, it's just never it's not going to come out of you.
00;55;21;12 - 00;55;40;20
Unknown
It's it's going to be too many stops and starts. The other quote is a Stephen King quote from On Writing, and it says, you must not come lightly to the blank page. So I feel like I'm I'm always raising the stakes. I'm always like, I don't want it to be like a casual like, oh, and then I met this boy.
00;55;40;21 - 00;55;59;22
Unknown
I liked him and he like me. We ran off and stuff like, it needs to be like, oh my God, what happened? Like, what are you doing? And like, everything has to feel that way. Like. Because why else write it? You know what I mean? Like why? I don't know, I feel like if it's if you don't come with, like, all guns blaring, is that it?
00;55;59;23 - 00;56;18;09
Unknown
Yeah. It's like. Yeah. Then it's kind of like, yeah, that was nice. And I believed it, but it's not special. And I want my books to feel. I want my readers to remember it long after they finish it, after they complete reading it, I want them to want to revisit. I want them to think, did I? What did I miss?
00;56;18;10 - 00;56;40;26
Unknown
Like I have to go back. I want them to then listen to the audio book. I want them to go back like I want them to have a relationship with it and discover new things in the story each time. And the only way I can do that is by raising the stakes and layering in as much as I can, that that's meaningful and that's meaty, that's lush and interesting to read.
00;56;40;26 - 00;57;14;02
Unknown
But that's also there's something else there. Like for me, reading, I read because I want to be entertained and I want to learn something. And ideally I'm getting both out of the same story. Absolutely. Yeah. Yes. So. Hi. Hi. My name is Karen. My daughter lives in Paris and 11. She's been there since 2021. What's her name? Her name is Jillian, and she's a copywriter for Deezer.
00;57;14;04 - 00;57;39;09
Unknown
I don't know her. Okay. Music service. Right. She's an avid reader. She loves you as an author. But more importantly, I am sitting next to a woman that went to school with you. You did? Oh my gosh. Yes. Hello. My friend Sadie here with you in New York and here tonight. And excited to see you here. I knew that you were coming to.
00;57;39;09 - 00;58;00;23
Unknown
And I was like, yeah, yeah, yeah, I've forgotten. But that's the most important part. My daughter loves Parish is in the oven and she's an avid reader. Book club. Jillian. Jillian. Yeah. She's not not written. Right, right. But man, she loves to read. So I'm excited to give her the spectrum. These teams going to be in the US next week.
00;58;00;24 - 00;58;20;03
Unknown
Excellent. Nice. Yeah. Until I'm doing something, I don't know if she's part of it, but there's an American woman's club. Oh, I'm doing a talk for them in October. I think she does belong to the American library. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. Okay. American women's club. I will tell. Yeah. Because she's actually. I couldn't write a word in my life.
00;58;20;03 - 00;58;30;04
Unknown
And this girl is wonderful. All right, one more. Yes, you.
00;58;30;06 - 00;59;03;00
Unknown
I recently saw on the. Oh, so I was, I was like, oh my gosh. Oh that's wonderful. Question for you. But you've ever seen about writing for TV or adopting. I'm hoping to have a more active role in adapting this piece, and I am also trying to trying to create another television, a couple of other television things.
00;59;03;00 - 00;59;23;15
Unknown
So we'll see. We'll see. I've always written the beauty for me of writing fiction was that I could do it by myself and I, and I didn't need to be part of a team or I didn't need approval. I could just kind of create it. And it was my my kind of escapism was my way of escaping, creating art without needing someone else's permission.
00;59;23;15 - 00;59;43;18
Unknown
Because acting, you're always waiting for permission, like you've dishes and whatever, and everything is like an ensemble. And I liked writing fiction because it was a solitary endeavor, as opposed to writing, usually working on a TV show as a group thing. But I've never worked on a TV show. I've never written for a TV show. But I'm I'm open to it.
00;59;43;18 - 01;00;06;05
Unknown
But but I'm also so happy in Paris. I don't want to. I don't know about maybe if they've got like a zoom room and I can just kind of like, you know, seem in with my croissant and my cigarettes and. No guys, but you ready to dig? Wait, do you smoke? No. Of course.
01;00;06;08 - 01;00;16;00
Unknown
Thank you so much. Thank you. Wonderful passion to me, everyone. If you don't have it already, get it? Thank you, thank you guys. Thank you.